Writing yesterday went beautifully — I got three scenes. Today it is tearing along, too — I’m excited. The end is in sight. I’m doing the climactic scenes now; it’s all new stuff because I really hated what I had, and what I’m getting is gorgeous. It ties in everything that came before, and it grabs me and twists. Another couple of days and I’m finally, finally, finally going to be done with Gods Old and Dark. I haven’t had a post-book celebration in a while, but I think I’m going to celebrate the finish of this one.
Category Archives: Gods Old and Dark
Howling toward the end
Triumph of the Dog’s Breakfast
So — I feel somewhere between the dog’s breakfast and underdone death. Nevertheless, I decided to write today. Desperation hath limits, but clinging flu ceased being one of them. And because I’ve been stalled out on the climactic scene, which I have rewritten and discarded too many times now — at about three thousand words a pop — I decided to start writing earlier today by just writing some notes to myself.
I did this rambling little piece about how I couldn’t figure out the point of view for the scene, and how I needed these specific actions from each of the characters, and how I wanted to see particular challenges and character development for a couple of them. I pointed out a personal struggle Molly is having.
And ‘click’. The scene — or rather, the three scenes that will replace the one scene I kept crashing over — fell into place. Much to my elation, the words are coming, and the first scene of the new triptych is filling out, and we win one for the dog’s breakfast, which would really like to go lie quietly in a corner somewhere except that my overdue deadline is getting deader and deader.
Onward, then, with triumph in my heart and and a touch of nausea elsewhere.
Hack, cough, wheeze, groan
Still sick. Did not write yesterday. Am not writing today. Going back to bed immediately after posting this, and staying there until I feel well enough to write.
Arrgh
Today did not go well, writing-wise. I’m hoping tonight will be better.
A moment for appreciation
I’m up — writing this morning in spite of the fact that I feel like hell. Doing a Baanraak and June Bug scene, and a Rekkthav scene (poor Rekkthav — junior dark god with “Kick Me” painted on the back of his carapace and a problem with bosses that just makes you want to weep) and feeling like crap, I am still having a whole lot of fun. The pages are rolling, the music is going, and this is what it’s supposed to feel like. (Except for the fever, but ignore that.)
I’m in a mood to wax effusive. It isn’t the fever talking, either. I think I made enough noise about my loathing for the whole Microsoft Windows XP concept (“pay big bucks to be our spyware/bugware OS beta tester, and call MommyRedmond to get our permission to reinstall your already-paid-for OS every time you change configurations or reformat your hard drive”) and about my search for something to save me from upgrading to anything Windows ever again that the fact that I’ve switched operating systems will elicit an eyeroll and an ‘oh, yeah, big surprise’ from most of the folks who read this. I kept looking for a Linux version that I could get to run on my old configuration — I wanted Linux because I loved the idea of open source software.
Well, I’m running Unix instead, of which Linux is an offshoot, and running straight Unix open-source software seamlessly and side by side with Apple software on my new iMac — the Christmas present that has had a bigger effect on my life and the pleasure I get in the physical aspects of my work than any present I’ve ever received or any purchase I’ve made myself. As a thoughtful gift for your resident writer, an iMac just friggin’ goes off the scale.
I have the baseline flat-screen model, which is like saying “I got the little Mercedes for Christmas”. Dropped an extra 256 megs of RAM in myself, a process that took three minutes from start to finish including opening and closing the case.
At rock bottom, it is just another computer, and just another operating system. The stuff you can do on OS X, the new Mac operating system, you can do on Windows, or Linux, or traditional Unix, or FreeBSD or anything else currently out there. You can process words and images and numbers, you can play games, and you can use the Internet, printers and other peripherals. Apple hasn’t found a way to make the thing write the words for you, so when you switch, you’ll have just as much work ahead of you to get the books written as you had before.
But my analogy to a Mercedes (the finest car I’ve ever ridden in, bar none) was not made lightly. You can get from New York to California in a Hugo, or you can get there in in an S-Class — the difference will be in how much you enjoy the trip. And, honey child, in the world of computing, I have been driving Hugos since 1985. I’ve written twenty-four novels on Microsoft systems, so it can be done. You have to get used to the feel of springs poking in your kidneys, and you have to be willing to forego air conditioning, and you have to plan ahead for frequent crashes and weary down-time, and sleepovers in bad hotels with giant cockroaches. You’ll hone your vocabulary of four-letter words to razor sharpness, and expand it into the realm of ten-letter profanity on bad days. But you can get twenty-four novels out on Win boxes. Only, if you don’t have to, why the hell would you want to? And now, for the first time, even if you’re command-line phobic and dread the unfriendliness of Linux, there really is a better way.
Everything is integrated in OS X. Frinstance …. If I want to move my music over from the disks that I laboriously made when leaving my Win box, I drop the the Windows-made disk into the CD-RW drive (yeah, the iMac will read your Windows-formatted disks and files. Don’t look for the same politeness from your Win box with your Mac stuff), and when its icon appears, I drag it into the open window of iTunes. The music is all instantly filed for me, sorted away, and added to the main playlist. I want to set up a few of my songs on a disk to take with me to keep the current book’s soundtrack with me? I create a playlist by making a name for it, dragging the songs I want into it — and then I open my new playlist and click “Burn CD,” right from iTunes. It burns in the background while I’m writing, and researching online. Wait for the machine to work? I don’t think so. I’ll have six or seven other things going at the same time, and everything will work anyway. Well … every once in a while Word freezes up. (It is, after all, a Microsoft product. Crashes come with the territory, no extra charge.) But when Word dies on me, I get a little message — “Your application has unexpectedly quit. None of the rest of your applications have been affected.” I re-open Word, fish out the saved copy the machine has thoughtfully dropped into the Microsoft User Data folder on my desktop, and go back to work. I have GIMP, a Unix image creation program open on my desk with OS X Dreamweaver MX and OS X Word all open together, everything running simultaneously, everything working together, and I can move stuff from the Apple programs to the Unix program and back without a glitch, a blink, a stutter. Everything works. And while I’m doing all this other stuff, my music runs in the background, smoothly and without stutters.
Blue Screen of Death, you say? No, Mercedes did not see the need to include planned breakdowns in its cars, and Apple, with OS X, did not see the need to include them in its OS. (Please note — I used Apple machines with earlier OSes — I hated them. I don’t like mice, I don’t like being constrained to mousing. I like keyboard commands — and OS X has them if you want them. I didn’t like the frequent crashing, either. I thought, ‘Hell, I already have that. Why change?’)
The open-source community is working madly to bring Unix applications to the Mac with OS X. Scripting is already here if you want to put the time into writing your own — or just plug and play the ones that come pre-installed. With your OS comes an amazingly generous complement of included, quality software that you’d have to pay through the nose for if you wanted something similar for your Win box. The command line is readily available if you choose to use it — I’ve poked around a bit, but, hell, I write books. For me, the command line is fun, but I’ll never need it. Everything I need to do, I can do in the most gorgeous interface I’ve ever seen.
At some point, it becomes about comfort. About fit and finish. About being able to drop a BB at the top of the hood of the car and watch it roll all the way to the bottom without having it fall in anywhere. The flat-screen iMac and OS X have that comfort. That fit and finish. All the seams are smooth. The engine purrs, so softly it’s just music. You can get from New York to California without having to mess with the radiator, fix flat tires, drop in a new transmission, roll down the window and eat dust when the AC dies.
This is a computer and an operating system combo with class. I haven’t been excited about tech stuff in about ten years. I am now. I’ve just found a computer I can love.
Disease Day in Deadline-Land
I’m down with something. Matt got it first, and has been sick as hell for about a week, but he’s getting better. Now it’s my turn. I woke up this morning feeling rocky, but put it down to not enough sleep. Got up, wrote, did okay — though I’m going to have to slice out about three thousand words first thing tomorrow, boy howdy, and I’m SO looking forward to that. But as the day progressed, I felt sicker and sicker and sicker, and now I rank my self high on the list of People To Be Avoided by the Healthy.
Coughing, aching, headache, more coughing, general malaise and overall wobbliness. I’m going to dodge into a hole and drink lots of fluids and hope this passes quickly. I’m one of those people I can’t stand to be around when I’m sick.
Trying to get the dream back
I woke up this morning, having just dreamed the solution to a problem I’m having with the revision. Problem was, it was five in the morning, and I didn’t go to bed until one AM. So I lay there thinking about how I would use this solution — fixed it carefully in my mind, was absolutely sure I was fully awake and would remember the damned thing when I got up — and went back to sleep.
Now it’s gone. I have some tantalizing fragments — one of Baanraak’s scales hung on a silver chain, the ring that Molly gave Seolar, a shattered mirror refracting light in a thousand directions, and Baanraak, come to destroy Molly, staring at his own reflection in this shattered mirror and seeing …
… what?
Even typing this hasn’t shaken it lose. It’s in there, dammit. I can feel it. I’m working in silence this morning so I don’t disturb it or miss it … just to give it a chance to poke its nose back out and say “I’m here — use me.” But so far it has remained elusive, just whipping by in shadow at the back of my mind, reminding me that it’s there but that I’m not fast enough to catch it. I can’t even remember which of the three major problems it was the solution too.
I’d beat my head on the monitor, but it’s an LCD screen and that would be bad.
Late Serendipity
Had some quiet late tonight, so I’ve been logging extra time on the revisions — and it’s paying off beautifully. I managed to rework and salvage the better part of one scene that I thought earlier today I was going to have to simply delete — I got the direction for the revised scene from a couple of deeply obsessive, disturbed Melissa Etheridge songs (I’m the Only One, Come to My Window, and I Will Never Be the Same) and the equally unnerving I’ll Be Watching You by The Police. In this case, it was just a matter of being in the right place at the right time to hear the music while being hit by a couple of odd coincidences … but no spoilers, so I can’t say what the coincidences are.
And the result is a dark, jaggy, Molly/Lauren/Baanraak scene that I’m pretty pleased with, instead of another three thousand words in the trash. I’ll take it. Done for the night. Back at the keyboard at six AM tomorrow. The stack of unrevised pages is visibly shorter tonight.
Superman
I’ve been working with wounded heroes this morning, and scarred villains, and I happened on the song that has to be the theme song for Gods Old and Dark — Superman, by Five for Fighting. If the tag line, “It’s not easy being me,” is trite and unworthy of the song, the rest could come out of the mouths of every single one of the main characters in the book — Lauren, Molly, Pete, Heyr, and Baanraak.
“I can’t stand to fly. I’m not that naive. Men weren’t meant to ride with clouds between their knees …”
They’re running up the stairs, not down, this morning. Running to the front of the plane, and this song echoes the price the hero pays to move forward when forward is the worst place to be.
But that it’s equally right for Baanraak … well …. What does it mean when your heroes and your villains could sing the same song, and it would be equally appropriate for all of them?
Different faces
Today was Baanraak and Pete, with some nice twists. Last night went pretty well — wrote another complete replacement scene, and started into the modification of the scene I worked on today.
I had to pull out another 3,000 words. So the book is still hovering just over 101,000 words, in spite of the fact that I’ve written a zillion new ones the last few days. The “two steps forward, two steps back” routine gets old. I’d like to see some numbers adding up to reflect all the work I’m doing. My only visible sign of progress is the decreasing size of the stack of pages at my left.